Taking a right on Bever to Wayne, I remember asking my parents, “Can we turn around? I don’t think I like this anymore.” Desperately wanting to get out of the car, I questioned if going to college was right for me. I didn’t know anybody, I didn’t know what I wanted to major in, I’d only been to Ohio once before. All I really knew was that I wanted to leave. 

Walking to class, I tried to recall the 5 domains of language: syntax, morphology, pragmatics, and… shoot. Couldn’t remember the rest. Should I really major in something I can’t even remember the basics of? Do I even like this?… Maybe I should give it some time. 

Packing boxes, I felt frustrated. I wondered if I’d be able to come back. I finally started to settle in and have to leave so quickly after. Will everything be okay? Will I have to spend the rest of freshman year at home and online? 

Stepping into the classroom, I was surrounded by unfamiliar faces. I had never taken environmental courses before but something this summer told me to do it. I fumble my way into a strange spinny chair, awkwardly waiting as the span of my nervous 15-minute early arrival ticks away. 

Declaring my major, I felt excited. Who knew that Environmental Studies could be mixed with the Humanities? I fell in love working at the garden during Sustainable Agriculture, even if the 3-hour long class peeved me at times. I had never felt this interested in a subject before. Do I like this? 

Stepping out of Kauke, I pass the ginkgo tree I’m journaling. The yellow leaves have fallen and illuminate my path toward Beall. I drink my vanilla-flavored coffee, hoping it will give me the energy to write my next paper. Taking a picture of a particularly pretty leaf, I smile to myself. I think I like this.